My reply was posted toward the op damon69's problem. With over 100K miles on any 3.0 motor the mounts are usually wore out. My daughters car is a 325xi not a X5, But the mounts are very similar to the X5 3.0 mounts. To check them I put a jack under the motor and lifted up a little, and I could see the mounts were not supporting the engine like they should. Original BMW motor mounts are fluid filled and all the fluid was gone. Its not a hard job to replace them, but its not an easy job. It all depends on your mechanical skills. Usually if your tach stays steady and you can feel the vibration through your shift knob and you have over 100K miles then there is a high probability your mounts need replaced. Dont use cheap mounts, they are not fluid filled or dont contain the right amount. Use genuine BMW or who ever makes the BMW ones. Good luck with your fix.