Okay, so it sounds like a regulator should take care of the problem but it is a crap shoot as to if I have a valeo or bosch. Btw I have seen (via DIY pics) that many of the alternators do have a marking on the black plastic cover on the back. The difference is fairly obvious if you take that black, plastic fan housing cover on the back opff the VR's are different.

I bought a bosch and a valeo regulator and then I'm going to try and get home in time to inspect and see what I have and then cancel the one I don't need. If worse comes worse I will have to return the one I don't need.

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2004 e53 m54 with 6spd manual