I presume you don't have the button circled in my photo, under the centre console top hatch? It has a dual function in my 2009 model, of releasing the phone cradle panel mechanically as well as enabling pairing. That is done by holding the button down as the key is turned to position 1.

No help to you if you don't have the button though. Right hand drive here in Australia, so layout will appear reversed.

Attached Images

 

__________________
Neil

2016 X5 3.0D
2009 X3 3.0D
2005 X5 3.0 Diesel Sport (sold)
2007 320i (sold)