I don't really know why, but I looked further into this, and found the following source, which seems pretty good
https://electrorefit.com/product/col...ol-engine-bmw/
About 80% of the way down that page, they even go through a few different home brew attempts (which of course they try to convince you that you'll still wish you just bought their product). Very interesting.
It seems as if the cleanest mod would be to change the wax to one with a lower temp phase change. But that's easy to say and not so easy to do. But that's what you'd want - a simple offset in thermostat opening, leaving the DME-controlled functionality the same. No extra electrical activity to wear out or trigger codes. Just like a wax thermostat from the 20th century.
If I had a 105*C V-8 I'd definitely get some solution, but with my M54, it is a less pressing issue.