Welp- My last 6hrs was spent inside the guts of my OE mirror. I determined that the new mirror assembly would physically fit. The harness back to the car is the same. To retain the auto dimming, heated glass, I would have had to remove the new mirror from its arm completely. That would have meant splicing ~11 or so wires while adding a few more for the dimming and puddle lights inside my OE covers. The new assemblies do not have puddle lamps. Not a huge deal.
In the end, I decided to find the mirror gear that I ripped off at the salvage yard and see about replacing gears. I found and swapped the gears. I also found entirely new gears and housings on Ebay. The most difficult part of the swap looks to be removing the door panel.
My biggest objextive was to have a mirror that doesn't just move where it wants on accell/decell. I accomplished that. But I will order the eBay kit and see about tackling my mirrors again soon enough.
Rock Auto was gracious in their return policy. I have boxed and printed a label at my expense to ship back.
Conclusion:
They have a few assemblies to choose from. Some are more expensive, but nowhere near as bad as the dealer. I found the unit metal and solid.
The three bolt mounts on these mirrors is the same. I believe the harness back to the drive window switch is also the same, whether all of the wires are there or not depending on options.
Check for gloss vs matte black. (Mine were gloss)
Check for dimming. These are not.This is the key mirror mount difference. I have aspheric glass and did not want to lose it
They are heated.