I don't know. On my X5 I don't have three relays in the back as shown on realOEM. I have the one Green one for the defogger and that's it for the green ones back there. I also have the two in the engine compartment which I swapped around. Also no help.

HMP I think were barking up the wrong tree. I'm starting to think this may have something to do with the throttle valve.

Lets just make sure we have the same symptoms:

Get in and turn the key to #2. Let it sit for 5-10 secs then start. It starts right up.

If you get in and turn the key right to start, Sometimes it does, sometimes it cranks forever untill you stop it and try again.

If I pull it out of the garage on to the driveway without letting it warm ALL the way up, it's a pain the @$# to start again no mater what ritual I try.

Changed the fuel filter and regulator.
Switched all the relays except the fuel pump relay around. You switched the fuel pump relay.
Every switch and sensor I disconnect for Troubleshooting sets a code. This problem has yet to set a code. Even with the code reader connected and the starter cranking away for all she's worth.