Hmmmm. Perhaps I did leave out a step that I'm not sure is necessary. Try this with the added step in all caps:

*Upgrade your Blackberry Desktop Software and 7100t firmware to version 4.0.
*Delete the BMW##### from the paired devices list if in the list of paired devices on the 7100t.

Then:

1) DISABLE Bluetooth in tools on the phone and turn the phone OFF.
2) Turn OFF the car and take they key out of the ignition.
3) Put the key back in and START the BMW.
4) PRESS MENU ON YOUR BMW AND SELECT "TELEPHONE". YOUR BMW SCREEN SHOULD SAY "ACTIVATE PHONE". IF NOT PRESS THE R/T BUTTON ON THE STEERING WHEEL, OR SELECT THE PHONE ICON ON THE BMW SCREEN.
4) Turn the phone ON and ENABLE Bluetooth on the tools menu.
5) Click the trackwheel on the phone and click on add device. You should see BMW#####...click on it.
6) Enter your Passkey
7) It should pair successfully, Then TURN OFF the car for a minute or so.
8) Start the car.
and YOU"RE DONE! If you have the same experience that I did you're 7100t now works automatically with the car.