Thanks for all the nice responses. I think my blood pressure has gone down to near normal levels, so I'm starting to think a bit more clear, along with all of your help.

My plan is to replace the MAF and if needed, just the two pre-cat O2 sensors (THANKS vinuneuro) and fix the power steering hoses. I should be able to do all that for under $1000 DIY and then sell it. I'm sure selling private party would yield more return, but Katie will probably not have the patience for a private party sell, and since it's her daily driver... I may have to take a beating at a dealer.

This is insane, but is there any interest here for a well used, but recently well cared for, 2001 X5 4.4i with 96,000 miles? Does $12,750 with the repairs seem reasonable? I probably just violated some forum rules too, sorry.