I don't think you have a phone issue. I have a Verizon Motorola Razr phone paired with my 2010 X5 35D which is not on the approved list and I have none of your problems. It is on BMW's list of previously approved list.

You have a problem with the audio system. Keep the phone unpaired with the car until your problem happens again and then take it back again. Ask the service manager and your sales person for help. Also ask them to start a case with BMW USA about your issue. Write a letter to the dealer's general manager and ask for help if the first does not help.

Also, check your Virginia's lemon laws. In California if you take a car in three times for the same problem and it is not fixed they have to take the car back.

Above all don't get mad at them in person. Be nice but firm.

They are just blaming the phone because they are stumped. Good luck.

Chuck