Perhaps it would have been more accurate for me to say hydrolock would occur in 20-30 seconds once the CCV malfunctioned and started to evacuate oil from the pan. But I don't think it would take too long to pull the available oil (when hot) out of the pan through the dipstick tube with full manifold vacuum. The real question becomes how much oil actually has to be in the combustion chamber before you start bending connecting rods - probably not very much.

2002 X5 3.0 242,000 miles
2004 325i 107,000 miles