i have put together the relays for the mirror controls. the project is mid-stream, but here are the parts used ( i ordered double of everything, as i anticipate the same relay bank for another sub-project within the car):
2 x Power Relay Coil 12VDC 12V DPDT Contact Rating 5A 240VAC 24VDC | eBay
2 x Power Relay Coil 12VDC 12V SPDT Contact Rating 10A 250VAC 30VDC | eBay
5pcs DC 12V Delay Timer Switch Adjustable Relay Module 0 to 20 Second NE555 | eBay
I have not tested the relay bank - i ordered a 5VDC(!) SPDT relay by mistake, so I am waiting for the correct relay (12VDC) to come...
On the picture,
the black wire - ground
the red wire - battery +12V
the green wire - trigger wire...
the wires for the actual mirrors are not soldered in yet, as I did not have an adequate colored wires - you can see 2 vacant pins on the white "underbelly" of the DPDT relay (between two blue relays).
next step is to identify a good box to contain the relays and good set of connectors... I will keep you guys posted...