Thanks for any additional replies. I went with Mobil 1 synthetic ATF for the non xdrive transfer case and Mobile 1 synthetic 75 90 for both differentials.

I am glad I checked first since I wrongly assumed at used the same fluid as my e46 330xi.

This 3.0 is so slow compared to the 4.4 I used to own, but I only use it as a wagon and like that the engine is the same as the e46 330si I still use.

I have learned so much on this site.