Thanks...I never thought anyone responded. I guess I didn't set the message thing. I left the lid as is...I will get a relay and see if that fixes it. Thanks again for the response.

Relay worked for me
 

I had the exact same issue and when I finally found that picture saying what each one was for, I realized someone had put the relay in the rear power seat slot...and I dont have rear power seats. Moved it over, pushed the button and heard the sweet motor click and the tailgate dropped!

Mine was messed up. My friend is an auto electrician. Right away walked over to the relay, pulled it out, looked at it, put it back in. Problem fixed ever since. Try it.

Well, someone gave me a used relay - tired it and it didn't work. So I can either get a brand new one or see if its a motor issue. Just had a thought - I could try moving the rear seat relay to tailgate section to see if it works.

Yup, you can try that.

Hmmm that no workie either. :-( oh well.

Time for a new switch me thinks.

Sorry..just know getting back to this again...which one would be the switch

RealOEM.com * BMW E53 X5 3.0i SINGLE COMPONENTS FOR TRUNK LID

I have no clue where the button is on that diagram.

Maybe its part of
20 Trunk lid weatherstrip, center 1 51718403232 $102.64

Just a follow to this thread....found the issue...looks like someone switch the relay and put it back in the wrong spot ( Not me)....The last place it was service was at the dealer. Not saying it was them....just saying.