Transmission free wheels ?
 

I just notriced that as I begin to slow down, ie: coast to a red light, at about 35mph the trans seems to go into a coasting mode...(or am I imagining it?)

I don't know if it would be the same for the 4.8is, but mine seems to downshift and actually engine brakes. It might have something to do with the 4.8is being an aggressive beast, so that when I hit the throttle it would instantly take off.

Agree with Slick:
Our X is a manual, so no comparo, but every auto trans I've had for the past decade plus, also slowed a little, on lifting.
Our previous CR-V, and our new(er) Hyundai Tuck do that 'slowing' quite a bit.

No clue on Daka's observation, of 'free wheeling'...
GL, mD

What I feel is that at about 35 it seems to go into neutral, above that there is some engine braking

It's your torque converter unlocking. All autos have torque converters... if they were locked up all the time you wouldn't be able to sit at a light in drive without moving or the engine dying.

It's normal.

Some cars do it immediately when you let off the throttle. Some do it at a lower speed. My old Range Rover didn't unlock until about 10 mph if that even.

Bingo!

ECS Tuning

OK, I guess I never noticed it before...my previous BMW was a 99 528iT, (best looking station wagon ever) I guess that transmission was different....