Car won't start or crank... battery?
 

Hi guys,

My car is an X5 E70 3.0 diesel to begin with. It won't start or crank. The ignition turns on, all the lights etc work. but all I hear is a clicking sound when trying to start it.

Now here's the story.

Two days ago, I went to start the car and it wouldn't work. Same symptoms as above. Worked fine the day before. After a few times trying, I left it, went back home and went out again. Put the key in, but I noticed the clock was reset. And the car started! Confusing. For me, at least. I knew that the battery was weak, and it had been for a while, (I have ordered a new one) but it started... until now. The car won't start. Same symptoms again. Now what confuses me is that it won't even work with a jump start... Does that still mean the battery is weak or could it be the starter or the alternator?

Appreciate all the help!

It is the battery. I wouldn't even start to consider other potential faults until you've at least eliminated the obvious one. If it doesn't start after that, then you can start to fault - find.

Confused. Seems you ordered a battery in the middle of a sentence....

Is the new battery installed? Yes or no?

If no, install it and see how it goes.

BMW does odd things with this system- it isnt just battery- cable- solenoid-starter like the old days. Various modules are sensing voltage and can inhibit jump starting.....

Sorry for the confusion, the battery hasn't arrived yet. I ordered it two days ago, and since it's weekend I need to wait til next week... So weird that it would inhibit jump starting... But the cars I tried to jump start with weren't particularly new or big ones either... And their batteries weren't new. So maybe the car wasnt given enough juice to be able to start? I'm just hoping for that...

Yeah, probably battery

Update:

My friend brought his truck with a bigger battery and jump started it - it worked!
BUT, as I was driving it to the shop, the car died. At first the wipers were going really slow.. Then I kept getting error messages of the 4x4 being out of order, transmission failure, airbags turned off etc... Such a panicking moment. Slowly everything shut down. Luckily I was able to pull over safely.
Called a tow truck and took it to the shop. It's most probably the alternator in this case. But I know for fact that the battery was weak too. Maybe it's them both combined? Or maybe the battery has always been good, but the alternator kept sucking all the juice out of it?
Anyway, I'm changing all of them. Not gonna pull up with any more headache.

Did you put the new battery in or just had it jump started? It could be either one. A bad alternator will kill a battery as well. But have the shop check the battery before buying a new one if you haven't already, may not be bad just yet.

The new battery hasn't arrived yet. It comes sometime next week. But yeah, I will have the shop to check the battery before installing the new one.

If you jump started it and then it died while driving it's the alternator, not the battery. Of course draining all the way down can kill a weak battery so you might have two problems now.

Yeah, I figured this is the case...
I just think it's weird that the alternator died "only" after 7 years. I mean, shouldn't they last longer?
On our E46 320i it lasted for 14 years... and on the Mercedes 32AMG it gave up after 12 years...
Maybe it's not even the whole alternator (generator) that's broken on the X5, but the volt regulator...
I'll have the mechanics to have a look at it.

what year is the car? If it's older than '09 it's very likely the battery. Mine went 2 years ago as an '08.

It's an 07. I bought the car three years ago. The battery isn't OE, so I'm guessing they've already changed it once?

Update:

The mechanic called today. He said the cables to the alternator were damaged. Didn't expect that. They fixed them, the car starts fine now. They checked the alternator and said it's fine. They're charging the battery atm and keeping the car 'til tomorrow to see how it behaves.
But what caused the cables to just break like that? I'm just hoping this problem isn't due to something else. Not really down to get stuck in the middle of the road again...

That is surprising, I've never heard of it happening to anyone else. It would be great if you could get the parts back and take pictures of them so we could see what happened and inspect ours.

Unbelievable.

Seriously. I dont believe him.

OP, did you check to see if your terminals were tightly fastened...I know its almost too remedial a question to ask but what if?
Wouldn't be cool of a technician to find that to be the fault and then to tell you the cables were faulty.

I know its extremely unlikely and there is probably not even a 1% chance anyone would do that, it's just that faulty cables seem just as an unlikely a prospect.

If the mechanic was going to lie he would have went with the alternator, no one is going to second guess that. Heck might as well say it killed the battery too. No one's going to question that either considering it's of unknown age.
I find it odd when people online second guess the only person who has actually put their eyeballs on the problem.

I'm absolutely certain the terminals were tight.
The mechanic wouldn't lie, he's a friend.

The cables to the alternator were loose. Im just glad it isn't something else (knock on wood).
Anyhow, another lesson learned. Always check your cables first people.
However there is something I'm worried about..

When I put the key in (no ignition), I get two lamps that illuminate. Handbrake which I always get. But this time I get the airbag lamp too. However it disappears after 2-3 seconds.
No malfunction messages on the iDrive or anything... Just a little lamp that turns on for 3 seconds.

What are your guys' thoughts about that? Didn't use to happen before.

Edit:
I notice all X5s are like this.... Mine was never like that until now... Uhm.. No idea what to make of this.

I think you just never noticed it. The air bag, brake, and check engine light are all supposed to light up when you put the key in and then turn off a few seconds after you start the engine. The reason for this is it will then be immediately obvious if someone simply disables the lights to hide a very serious problem.

My check engine light doesn't light up when I put the key in. Only when I start the ignition... But I have to add, I live in Sweden. My x5 is of European model. Maybe they're different than American models..

Yes, it's quite easy to forget how the internet makes for a small world!