My daughters got a Toyota and a Honda for their first vehicles. Those fit their savings and budgets. We helped out, but we won't buy them cars. One daughter thought we should buy her an M3 at one point (she liked the colour). Good time for a life lesson. The Honda and Toyota were safe, and were both equipped with serious snow tires.

We have had both an X5 and an E46. When we sold the X5 it was newer than our E46, which my wife drove daily, but my wife wouldn't drive it, she thought it felt big and heavy. Having an SUV was practical for us, so we got her a new X3, which she liked much more than the X5. It was more similar to her E46.

Your daughter sounds like she needs a Honda more than she needs a BMW, but if you want to get her one, an E46 makes much more sense than an X5 IMO. E46 is more reliable than an X5, and better on fuel. Not sure who is making the decision, since you say you don't think it is a good idea.

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2007 X3 3.0si, 6 MT, Premium, White

Retired:
2008 535i, 6 MT, M Sport, Premium, Space Grey
2003 X5 3.0 Steptronic, Premium, Titanium Silver
2002 325xi 5 MT, Steel Grey
2004 Z4 3.0 Premium, Sport, SMG, Maldives Blue