Be sure you have ALL the transmission software updates. This helped my '07 X5 4.8i.
The other part of the problem is the run flat tires. They suck, and they're even worse the larger the rim and the wider the tire (I.E. the sport package wheels/tires).
I just took off my 20" Michelin summer run flat tires 315 R/275 F) and installed my 19" 255 f/r run flat winter tires, and even that improves the ride. I can only imagine how cush it would be on 18's with non-run-flat tires and 'normal' rear springs (vs air springs in the sport/third row cars).
How the car is equipped makes a big difference.
All that said, other than the choppy highway ride I like the way it handles the mountain passes... Life is full of trade-offs.
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