As I sit here in the hotel lobby, watching my Skins trounce the Niners, and waiting for chatterbox/Gene Wilder to arrive for the ride back to DC (those who were at dinner last night know who I mean- stay away from Craigslist, people), I thought I'd reflect on a great weekend here in the former gold rush town of Charlotte...

People here drive FAST. Radar detectors are legal here (I live in one of the 2 places in the country where they are illegal) and EVERYONE seems to have one. Grandmas even speed through shopping center parking lots like it's the Speedway! Gotta love a state where the Max posted speed limit is 70!

Pork rinds are available everywhere. That's a big old plus in my book.

The girls are all hotties, not as many rednecks as I imagined, either. Maybe they're just rednecks in disguise, with their Mark Martin sticker on the INSIDE of their Jeep? Lots of hotties in Jeeps here today

Everyone but me knows how to golf. I think I may have to return with the future Mrs. for tandem golf lessons. I bought her more jewelry, she friggin owes me.

There are some fine ass Daisy Dukes working at this hotel. Wish I could do more than flirt. You ain't supposed to fool around with the 'help' anyhow. Thurston Howell the third would certainly look down on that.

Here's less of an observation, more of a story, but it's all true, as surreal as it was...

There was a group of cheerleaders staying here for some event, they were from colleges all over the southeast. I tried to talk some of them into coming out to dinner last night, but they were like a herd of wildabeest to my lion, and I couldn't manage to pick out the weak or infirmed one, so I didn't pursue. When I returned to the hotel, they had all moved into their rooms. Damn. I did manage to have a drink with Mary, the Marketing Director for Toyota's NASCAR endeavor, who was staying here last night. She kinda looked like the chick from those Mercury TV commercials, which ain't bad at all. She was at the track yesterday for the truck races. She knew a lot about cars, especially aftermarket import tuner products. When the hotel bar closed, the bartender, good guy that he is, asked us if we wanted the check together (a good bartender does that when he sees a dude chattin' up a chick, to facilitate the exchange of room numbers). She quickly whipped out a $20 and said "seperate", a seasoned veteran of the bar encounter obviously. I told her it was all good, that I had enough talking about rice racers for one evening as I paid my bill, THEN she got interested! She must be used to dudes falling all over her and when I jabbed at her about the Toyotas, she perked up. She walked away towards the elevator, swinging her hips, and glanced over her shoulder back at me. I waved goodbye and headed up to my room hoping Real Sex or something would be on HBO.

First time I had ever been to Charlotte for anything other than a layover at the airport, I'll be back!

JV

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JV

What gets us into trouble is not what we don't know...it's what we know for sure that just ain't so