How many RPM when this vibration is happening idling in gear?

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What are the tranny mounts for?it can be a lot of things though you can narrow them down since it's only vibrating in drive mode
Read this article..AGCO Automotive Repair Service - Baton Rouge, LA - Detailed Auto Topics - Finding the Cause of Automotive Vibration, Pt.2

There are several things that could be going bad, but first you need to tell us a few things, how many miles on the clock, do you have a service history?

128000 been thru the whole truck bmw claims it is a known behavior of the truck
when they first found out about it they would update the software to increase the rpm to fix the issue. then after a certain year they can't modified the software and told customers it was normal behavior.but mine comes and go.

By your description my first thought was the idle is too low. What happens if you increase the idle in drive by 1-200 RPMs. Does the vibration go away? Does the vibration continue as long as you are in drive holding with the brake at normal idle and the increased idle?